The Final Word on the B(c)S!

Elitism, A Love Story

By now much, if not everything that really matters, has been said about the BCS disaster that will spoil what was yet another great year in college football. It is hard for me to understand how the regular season of any sport can mean more and be more exciting than the postseason. It would be like watching the NFL all year and then getting depressed after Week 17. That doesn't even make sense in my head, but such is the state of college football in 2009. The only sport that prefers to be an 8 track when it could be a third generation ipod. The BCS represents everything that is reprehensible to our society: Elitism, Hypocrisy, Double-speak, Greed, Sloth, Arrogance, Lack of Accountability and Absolute Power. I wonder how much Bill Hancock, aka the BCS' little spokes-bitch, gets paid to shovel us his slop. Luckily for him he doesn't have to look at himself in the mirror at night. After all, you have to have a soul before you can have a conscience. I get physically nauseous when I hear him throw out quips like "Nobody else has managed to come up with a better solution", or "We never said it was a perfect solution, only the best one so far", or my personal favorite "We love talking about the possibilities of a playoff and we always look for ways to better our sport." Bill is an arrogant, self-righteous, and certainly self-loathing coward. And those are probably his best traits. And please don't tell me he's only doing his job, which is to promote the benefits of the BCS. Nobody put a gun to his head and forced him to sell his soul.

He says there are too many unsolved questions. Questions such as the following:

How many teams would be involved in the playoff?
Would there be automatic qualifiers?
When would the games be played?
Would they be on neutral sites or on home field?
What would you do with the rest of the bowls?

(Before you go any further, I want you to stop reading this and go here:

http://rivals.yahoo.com/ncaa/football/news?slug=dw-ncaafplayoff120709&prov=yhoo&type=lgns

Dan Wetzel, sports writer for Yahoo.com has put together one of the best articles I’ve read recently on how simple and extraordinarily lucrative a 16-team playoff would be in college football- while exposing the BCS and it’s cartoonish attempt at defending the current system by hiring an outside PR agency. It’s a must read.)

Of course, these questions have actually been answered by so many different people so many times, I believe we could have a dozen logistically and financially sound plans for a playoff on the table for discussion within 5 minutes of posting the announcement that it's up for debate. The fact remains that the BCS is so hypocritical that it would never entertain an idea of a playoff no matter how sound the plan is, because they can't bear to face the thought of losing out on the huge cash cow they have in place right now. And this is why I hope Congress gets involved- the hypocrisy. The smugness. The double-speak that we all so disdain in our daily lives but hear spewed forth from every BCS homer until it makes our ears bleed. This all goes back to my original point about the regular season. It's over, folks! And guess what, we all know that it was the best part. College Football- the only meal where you DON'T look forward to dessert. Who in the room is excited to see Texas Tech play Michigan State in the 'I Just Threw Up in my Mouth Bowl?' Fascinating. What about Georgia Tech and Iowa in the 'Meaningless Bowl Games for Dummies Bowl?' Can't wait. My personal fav: USC vs. Boston College in the 'Do We Honestly Have to Go Through With This' Bowl. I didn't even know Boston College won 2 games this year, let alone qualified for a bowl. Honestly, if we can't get a playoff let's just end the season after the conference championships and have one game- 1 vs. 2 and be done with it. I'm dead serious. Oh, I know the kids deserve to be rewarded for their stellar 6 and 6 seasons- but I deserve to be rewarded, too. I spent a lot of time watching games, buying merchandise and putting my fat butt in the stadium. What do I get out of it? The Little Effing Caesar's Bowl. What do the players get in their swag bag at that game? 2 for 1 coupons? Free breadsticks? Hey, give me a spear like the Little Caesar's guy and I'd shove it up Bill Hancock's pasty white cheeks. (By the way, I thought student athletes couldn't get freebies while attending school, something about NCAA violations??? I guess when the freebies come directly from sponsors and pass through the blood-soaked hands of the NCAA, it's okay to not only bend the rules, but completely disavow that they even exist at all. Apparently hypocrisy is a table for two when the NCAA and the BCS come to dine.) To say that the BCS is the best plan up to this point is like saying I'd rather kill myself with a shotgun than with a toothpick. Sure, it's more efficient, but they're both still painful as hell and end in a bloody mess. I just simply do not understand how an organization like the BCS can come in and pitch it's tent smack dab in the middle of camp college football, kick dirt in almost everyone's face and get away with it with no repercussions whatsoever. I despise the networks- especially ESPN- for their role in this mess. Mark my words, in 3 years the NC game will be a PPV event that will cost you upwards of 60-70 bucks to watch. Maybe they'll bundle all the BCS games into a nice package and throw you a 10% discount so you can see 'em all for 119.00, plus tax and surcharge. Don't think ESPN isn't drooling over the possibilities. Will the players get any of that money like boxers or UFC fighters do? Don't make me laugh. It will go into the fat pockets of the even fatter-jowled BCS administration, with a bone thrown to the schools and some vomited scraps heaved the way of the non-BCS schools. There is one and only one way the system will ever change- Congress. It's a sad, sad world we live in when the government of a world-leading country has to get involved in something as innocuous as college football, but if it means there is a chance for change and I won't have to listen to Bill Hancock as an added bonus, hey, I'm going to embrace it.

AJD