I want you to think about that number for a second. It's a number that could apply to a lot of different things in your life. As in, the amount of time you actually spent listening to your teachers in high school. Or maybe the amount of your lifelong earnings since the age of 5 that you've blown on video games and bazooka gum. (If you don't know what bazooka gum is you are too young to be reading this.) It certainly could be the amount of time on air that Chase Daniel was seen last year on the sideline with his finger in his nose. But I digress. I think you know by now where I'm going with this. Yes, the college football season will officiallly be one-third of the way over after this weekend. Yeah, I thought about jumping, too. But don't do it. There is a sunny-side to that equation and that is that the best two-thirds of the season are yet to come. Don't believe me? Then you're either a Colorado fan or you haven't taken a look at this weekend's fantastic match-ups. But before we move on there were some true classics and some serious upsets last weekend. WA/USC.....FL/Tennesse...ND/Mich. St...VTech/Nebraska...BYU/Bobby Bowden's Criminals...and depending on which sideline you were cheering for, you either aged 10 years in a matter of mere minutes or you held onto your sanity for one more week.
Fingernails were chewed to the nubbin, expletives were no doubt thrown around like jello at a food fight in elementary school and hearts were yanked squarely from fan's chests and promptly stomped on repeatedly with steel-toed workboots. And yet, we all (at least I really hope all) somehow found the reason, the wherewithall, the inner drive to get outta bed the following morning. Why? Because of the two words at the beginning of this blog. That's right, one-third. For most fans, there is still hope of a decent, perhaps even stellar season. Which is why one-third can also be a great number. If for no other reason than you still have two-thirds of the season to prove to that mother-lovin neighbor of yours that his team really does suck AND his kids are uglier than yours.
Your Trash Talk is Okay, But Mine is Better
Lane Kiffin is the Kanye West of college football. Am I the only one who is already done with this guy? Please, win some games before you embarrass your father anymore. I know a lot of the media types and even fans love the trash talk and the fact that he and Coach Meyer were sent to their respective rooms by the SEC Commissioner, but at least Meyer can back up what he says with W's, which is more than I can say for Mr. Kiffin. And you thought Bob Knight was polarizing. At least when he spoke he could use the 'crazy old man' defense. At first I thought Kiffin was doing his part to bring attention to his school and build up a season that would be otherwise completely and utterly meaningless to the rest of the country, but his act is already getting old. Unless he pulls off an upset of epic proportions sometime during the next year or two, I never want to hear another word that comes out of his piehole.
Erase and Rewind
In week 2 I called out Ole Miss as pretenders...and they proved it tonight against an average South Carolina team. I also called out Oklahoma St, Penn St (they'll win this week against Iowa but they're still weak) and yes, I went against my better judgment and picked Ga. Tech over Miami a couple weeks back. Well now Miami has a very tough game at Virginia Tech- a team that basically got steamrolled for 59 minutes last week against Nebraska but who gets Miami at home as well. I have to go with my gut on this and my gut is telling me to go grab an ice cream sandwich. And after I do that it says I should pick Miami, even though you know those kids have been listening to how great they are the for the last few weeks and they could come out and lay an egg against that defense. But here's why I think they win. Tech's offense couldn't score points if they were playing ping pong against an amputee and Miami has the defensive speed to slow down Tech's only real offensive weapon- Ryan Williams. Please don't tell me they have to contain Tyrod Taylor. Please, just don't. I said don't! I'm not listening to you! Lalalalalalala!!!! ...okay, sorry. As I was saying, Taylor continues to be unimpressive in big games and did nothing to show me otherwise last week when he was shut down for negative rushing yards and had one impact play on offense all game. Miami will continue to roll over ranked teams until they face Oklahoma, which will be Sooner than later. He he....hehehehehe....
For those of you who live down south, I mean waaaaaay down south, as in you are so far south that you're actually looking UP at the armpit of the lone star state...texas tech against Houston should be a great game. I see Tech putting the clamp down on the Oilers...er...Cougars and sending another non-BCS team packing. I didn't say I WANT tech to win, I just said I think they will. And are there really Cougars in Houston?
I don't get that one. Oh, wait, you mean THOSE kind of coug...uh, nevermind.
And speaking of dangerous animals, um, Florida- look out for the Kentucky Wildcats. They always play you tough and you just came off a very emotional week against The Orange and White Kiff-sicles. Actually, I think they'll be okay, but I'm just saying watch out. You know, like how you should watch out for cars when you cross the street. Same thing.
Alabama is for real. Geez, it hurts me right here when I say that.
Can Cal beat Oregon? At Oregon? Yep, sure can. Not because of Best, but have you seen Oregon's quarterback play? It's pathetic and while it might not be quite as bad this Saturday, it's still not what they are used to in Duck country. Maybe the QB is just focusing too much of his time worrying about whether or not his jersey and pants match his cleats. Honestly, if Heidi Klum ran a college football team it'd be Oregon.
Outrageous Prognostications
Georgia will finish in the Top 10 this year
So will Nebraska
USC will lose 3 games and still finish #1 in Kirk Herbstreit's Top 25 rankings
Miami will play for the National Championship
BYU will get upset this weekend to Colorado St and after his 4th interception Max Hall will drop the F-bomb on national TV
Cincinnati will go undefeated...in basketball
Coach Zook will be fired from Illinois at the end of the season...
...which is better than Dan Hawkins, who will be home handing out candy bars to trick or treaters at Halloween.
Oklahoma will win the Red River Shootout, Landry will lead Oklahoma to an 11-1 season, win the Heisman in 2010 and STILL only be remembered as having the worst facial hair in the history of college football
Tebow wins the Heisman...yep, you heard it here first!!!
Have a great weekend,
Andrew
Posts
No comments:
Post a Comment